WhitePrivilege.com

excerpts from “Chinese and American Cultures Clash in Custody Battle for Girl” by Andrew Jacobs, www.nytimes.com, 3/2/04

For five years, Jack and Casey He and Jerry and Louise Baker have been tussling (in the courts) over a child who was born to the Hes, but who ended up with the Bakers for what both sides initially agreed was a temporary arrangement.

The Hes say their daughter was “kidnapped by white Christians” who have been using their wealth and the courts to their advantage. Although the couples signed papers describing the setup as temporary, the Bakers say there was a separate verbal agreement giving them permanent custody of the child, a contention the birth parents deny. “Why would we visit our daughter every week if we wanted to give her away?” Mrs. He asked tearfully.

The Bakers’ lawyers say that what ultimately matters is the welfare of 5-year-old Anna Mae He, who has seen her biological parents only once in more than three years as a result of a court order. “What kind of quality of life is the child going to have in China?” asked Larry Parrish, a lawyer for the Bakers. “Common sense dictates that to take a child out of an environment where she’s firmly attached and settled is the ultimate devastation.”

Soon after (his wife’s) arrival (to the U.S.) in 1998, Mr. He was accused of sexual assault by a fellow student. University officials suspended his scholarship and student stipend, the couple’s primary means of support. Mr. He’s student visa was revoked, and immigration officials began deportation proceedings against the couple. Mr. He was eventually acquitted of the assault charges.

As their financial and legal problems deepened and Mrs. He’s pregnancy advanced, a friend suggested that they contact Mid-South Christian Services, a private adoption agency in Memphis. Agency employees said the couple, who had no health insurance, were seeking a foster family of means to take care of the child while they sorted out their finances. Legal documents they later signed spelled out the arrangement as temporary. What the couple says they did not understand was that the word “temporary” was not what it seemed: regaining custody required the blessing of the Bakers and the consent of a judge. Agency and court employees and a Chinese language translator have testified that no one explained the complex nature of the agreement. The couple, they said, was not advised to hire a lawyer.

The discord reached a peak on Anna Mae’s second birthday, when the Bakers refused to allow the Hes to take her out of the house for a family portrait. The Bakers called the police, who, Mr. He said, warned them to stay away from the Baker home or face arrest. Fearful of further trouble with the law, Mr. He says he complied. What Mr. He says he did not know was that under Tennessee law, a four-month lapse in visits can be construed as abandonment, part of the legal argument for terminating parental rights.

The Bakers depict Mr. He as untrustworthy and his wife as prone to hysterics. Mrs. He once picketed the Bakers’ home, and on another occasion, they say, tried to wrest Anna Mae away during a chance encounter at a Wal-Mart. “To me, if Casey truly loved her daughter, she would leave her with us,” Mrs. Baker said. She added that a life in China, where female babies are sometimes deemed inferior to males, would be a hardship.

Mr. He says that in China, Anna Mae would benefit from an adoring extended family, many of whom are well educated. Mr. He also says that he has been offered a job in China, and that he will make enough money to provide his daughter a comfortable life. “If we do not have a reunification, I’m afraid our daughter will grow up thinking we abandoned her,” he said. “I think that is worse than anything else.”

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